I'm sorry Tommy
by alluress
Summary: "Love me. If you've ever been my friend, love me." To love someone, you have to love yourself. And Newt just couldn't do that. *The Maze Runner Fan fiction - Newt x Thomas* *All characters, themes and plot credit to James Dashner*


**Chapter 1**

Blinking through the aggressive darkness of my surroundings, I struggle to find my bearings.

"Hello?" My croaky voice echoes through the blackness.

Where am I? Who am I? Questions flood my brain, as I try to recollect anything from my memory. But I am left with a great blank.

A jolt of panic courses down my spine and as I attempt to identify the space around me. Stretching out my arm, I hesitantly brush my hands along the walls that surround me. A metallic surface meets my fingertips and I quickly pull my arm back, surprised. I decided to explore some more and soon after, I came to the frightening conclusion that I was, in fact, sitting inside some sort of metal box. An elevator? Lift? I scrambled to my knees and quickly stand up. How did I know what that was? How did I know what an elevator was, and not my own name? Sitting back down, I clutch my legs with my arms as panic courses through my body as the minutes tick by, and the hours crawl past.

An unfamiliar voice breaks the lonely silence. "Rise and shine greenie. My warmest welcome to the glade. Enjoy your stay."

Blinding light pours into the cage-like room and I snap my eyes shut in shock, only to open them again and squint at the person standing above me. My eyes struggle to adjust to the harsh brightness and I lift my hand up to cover my eyes.

"Where am I?" I gasp, as I peek through my fingers and fix my eyes on a group of teenage boys peering down at me, amused expressions playing on their faces.

"Well shank, if you ever find out, let me know." A boy with dirty blonde hair replies snarkily.

I try my very best to shake off the rude comment and try to focus on the situation at hand, instead of how beautiful the stranger is.

I blink rapidly, confirming my terrifying suspicion that this is in fact real, and not a dream.

An Asian boy offers his hand, and I take it. His grip was firm and steady and for some strange reason it gave me comfort. He pulls me out of the box onto the ground.

"The name's Minho. What's yours? Do you know?"

"Uh, T - Thomas. I think." I stammer, processing the realisation that I finally knew my name. Thomas. The name clicked.

"Good that. Some greenies don't even know their names at the beginning. Ignore Newt, he doesn't have the best manners at times." Minho says, taking a firm grasp of my shoulder and steering my staggering legs across the grass, away from the pack of boys still standing around the box. I could just make out the boy with the dirty blonde hair pointing down at the box and barking orders at the others around him. I stared as some of them jumped down and began to unload items from the box up onto the ground as Newt just stood there watching them.

Suddenly, his gaze lifted to mine and I couldn't look away. I tried to smile at him and expected some sort of friendly wave but instead received a frown. Breaking the gaze, I shook my head - I should stop thinking about him, I get the feeling he didn't want to be wasting his time with a 'greenie' like me.

I don't remember much of my life before the glade, but the feeling of being unwanted is not as unfamiliar as I would want it to be.

"Why am I here?" I turned to face Minho once again.

"Well as Newt has already told ya, if you find out, let us know." Minho chuckled, still walking me towards a big hut.

Newt. I loved that name.

"What are you smiling at?" Minho was looking at me with a confused, yet amused look on his face.

I wiped the dumb smile off my face, dismissing him with a "nothing."

Minho shook his head at me and I watched as he fist-bumped, high fived and ass-slapped the people around him as he walked past.

I made a mental note that Minho must be very popular around here.

A chorus of "Welcome to the Glade, dude." and "Yo greenie!" greeted me as I followed Minho into a wooden hut.

"Now, this is where you'll be sleeping during your time here. And don't ask how long that will be, because we don't know that either." Minho gestured towards an uncomfortable looking hammock, squished between two others.

"Uh thanks." I replied, still in a daze.

"Oh, and if you haven't quite figured it out yet, this is the Glade and we call ourselves the Gladers." said Minho as he turned and gave me a friendly slap on the shoulder.

All of a sudden a chubby, curly-haired boy barrelled towards me and skidded to a stop just inches in front of me.

"Hey roomie!" he exclaimed, his excitement evident on face.

"Uh hey, my name's Thomas." I stammer, confronted by his enthusiasm.

"- and this is your new roommate Chuck. That should be about all, you're set to go now Thomas. I've got to go, so for now, Chuck will be showing you around. Good luck!" said Minho and with a curt nod he walked away.

"I love your name! My name's Chuck, like Minho said and I am going to be your new best friend! If we get out of the glade, we can live together, raise kids together, teach them how to ride a bike together, eat ice cream toge-"

"Wait, hold up. What do you mean if we get out of the glade?" I demand, my heart sinking.

"Wake up pretty boy, we're stuck here. Probably till the day we die too! And don't think about making that death come prematurely. We've tried that too." A new voice adds dryly.

I didn't need to turn around to see whose face belongs to the voice, relying on the onslaught of shivers for that information.

"I'm not going to try and kill myself Newt, I'm not stupid." I retaliate, hurt and confronted by Newt's attitude towards me.

Surprisingly, something other than a cold, hateful expression flashes on Newt's face, but I don't know what, and I don't know why.

I choose to ignore it, because the sting in my chest when I saw his face fall wounded me in a way I hoped I would never have to feel again.

But I should've known better.

I gaze up above me, stars sprinkled across the sky. Swinging gently in my hammock with the quiet snores of the Gladers calming the night, I am finally left with time to reflect on the day.

Why did Newt hate me so much? What had I ever done to him? I'd only just met him a couple of hours ago. What the fuck was his problem?

I groaned and shifted in my hammock, frustrated at the conflicting emotions battling in my mind. It was surprising that I was more concerned about Newt's feelings towards me than this whole 'trapped in here forever' situation. To be completely honest, the reality that I was stuck here forever hadn't truly sunk in yet and I hadn't given it much thought.

All I could think about was the boy who passionately hated me and also happened to be the boy who looked like God's gift to man, smelt like a wet dream, and spoke like a sweet angel (a British one,if you must know).

"Ouch! Fuck!"

Speak of the devil, and he shall appear.

"Shit! Who the hell put that there?" A drunken voice slurs in the darkness.

"Shut up Newt, or you'll wake the others!" I whisper, trying to make my voice sound stronger than I felt.

"Don't talk to me greenie, you know absolute shit."

"Well then tell me shit, Newt!"

"Why would I waste my time on a little freak like you?" Newt sneers, with disgust dripping off each word.

"Because maybe you'll find I'm worth it. Maybe you'll find you like me!" I whisper back.

Newt stalks towards me, his lanky legs accidentally stepping on a few boys on the way.

"Listen here, James. I don't care for greenies. I'd rather die than get to know you so don't think you can waltz into this hell-hole and make this shitty place any better than it already is. Because you can't and you won't. The sooner you bloody realise this, the better."

I was speechless as I watched Newt's chest rise and fall, his cheeks flushed with pure rage.

I couldn't trust myself to reply without tears falling from my already watering eyes, so I tried my best to conceal my emotions and swallow my tears.

I muttered the only thing I could, "My name isn't James. It's Thomas."

Newt's face turned from a deep red, to a deep purple.

"I'm so fucking sorry Tommy!" He sarcastically whispered, throwing his arms up in the air, and storming away from me as I stood there, stunned.

The only thing that stopped me from dissolving into a puddle of salty tears, was the sound of Newt calling me 'Tommy.'


End file.
